I’ve heard voices since I was a child. I didn’t know what was going on. I never panicked because I assumed the voices were aloud. When you don’t know what voices are, they manifest in different ways. Among them– telepath, twin flames, angels and psychic mediumshp. This is Gladys. She started out as Kathie God. When things first started to get bad in 2017, I had a bad heartbreak. My friend at the antique mall seemed to be an angel. In fact, I thought every worker had a sign for me as they were ascended masters. One woman had so many signs, I thought, “Wow, I thought that woman must be God.”
There was a light in her eye like a laser. She had to be God.
Kathie God would talk to me in my head. I remember two times vividly. That heartbreak? A guy had turned me down. She walked me through my response, me making fun of him. I don’t think it translated via message. I just seemed strange. Another time was in my studio above the antique mall. I became afraid of astral projectors. I thought they were spying on me. Kathie God coached me through what to do. Destroy five paintings as performance art to scare the astral projectors away. I took a bow when I was done.
A couple weeks later, I started my year of residential mental hospital stays. Residential is like psychiatric care, but longer. Kathie God died one of my first weeks or months; I can’t remember. It fed into my belief that she was God. Her mission with me was through, right? I probably talked to her ghost, as that was the main delusion of 2019. Eventually, she was fictionalized. An alien working at an antique mall. With this one, I went too heavy on the squeegee. Happy accident? Possibly.
When I got to a group home called Ultimate Hope, I finally read an audiobook version of a novel she had. The Weird Sisters.by Eleanor Brown. So many messages. I got the last conversation I never got. My nickname was always Bean, and there was a character with that name. I can’t call Kathie by the name God, but I do believe in angels. This woman advised me to make art during a time that was devoted to futile writing. Kathie God had me paint turtles for a friend and wanted to pay me, but I told her I wanted something from her booth at the antique mall. She got my painting in exchange for a director’s clapboard. The painting was of turtles. Pretty good despite my rust.
She also gave me advice on these two works.
The second was destroyed in the event I described.
Well, here I am writing. I just now have my subject. Art. Always. Thank you, Kathie Angel.
To buy Gladys, visit the Arts for All Wisconsin website, under Zelda Bean.
https://arts-for-all-wi.square.site/shop/zelda-bean/CZA4XFAFXCAOYUNXSXIWU5WI